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Welcome To California

“The family.  We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another’s desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together.” 

~Erma Bombeck

fly cat got fly

Welcome to the California- June Fly On The Wall

Have you ever thought about what people might think if they saw what goes on behind-the-scenes at your house? Do you ever wonder what it would be like to catch a glimpse of someone else’s daily life? Here’s your chance. Today 14 bloggers are inviting you into their homes to be a fly on the wall.

The real, the weird, the life as only my circus can live it…

 Welcome To California!

fly something fly

We broke the rule.

If you haven’t hung out here much, I may have stated on several occasions that we don’t allow house guests beyond the kids friends sleepover sort of thing. I may have also stated the fact that I’m a weird troll that spends a lot of time working from home, thus justifying my crazy in my own mind.

With that said, I shall now open my big fat mouth and insert my size 8 foot into it.

For the official record: House guests can be fairly awesome… just depends on who you are moving on into the family and I think I might have hit the rad lotto on this one.

fly when you couyld take the train

Step right up and join the fun!

There are plenty of seats… slide down, make friends so everyone has room to bear witness to the some of the of the Nuttiest performers gathered under one roof!

flying car

Meet the amazing oblivious woman…

“Ma!” K hollers from the back seat of the truck on the way to Magic Mountain theme park. ” I thought that car was flying… Turns out it was just going up a hill.”

peanut

The Bonus Kid that claims me when my own don’t…

“Peanut!! P-E-A-N-U-T!!” I’m screaming over the roller coaster that separates me and a kiddo often found hanging around my house but didn’t travel the hour to the theme park with us.

“MOOOOM!” She yells back waving when she see’s me.

Behold my powers to multiply… and I didn’t even have to pay a hospital bill.

(Love you Dez-asourous Rex!)

mess with texas

The Literal Liberal…

“I just don’t understand why people just don’t give peace a chance. If everyone thought that everyone else was carrying a gun then maybe there wouldn’t be crime… like in Texas,” says Kenzie.

“Texas has the same problems as everywhere else babe. Why do you think Texas is safer?” I question.

“I hear they have gun racks in their cars and all those bumper stickers say ‘Don’t Mess With Texas’. Point taken.”

chapstick

The Crazy Cat Girl…

“Um Min, The chapstick your putting on was in the cat box all day. I fished it out of poop and meant to throw it away,” K says to her sister Min.

Conveniently right in the middle of Min slathering her lips with the stuff, K decides that now would be the pertinent time to fill her sister in on that little gem.

Lyss (The newbie around here… see below) then went ahead and slathered some on too stating “only the cool kids pee their pants.”

She might officially be my hero and there’s several people who now need to wash their hands.

Stop looking at me swan. ;)

stinky peopleThe Boy Wonder…

We wonder how something some cute can produce such a smell from a pair of sneakers that would burn your nose hairs clean out, make you eyes instantly tear and checks ones gag reflex. Usually the assault begins casually… “Who took off their shoes in the car?! You have 36 seconds to put them back on before I erupt into flames and die right here on the spot from such noxious fumes.”

Nope no drama here… moving along.

shera 1Please give a big hand for the newest performer in our circus!

Given that she is the Handsome Prince’s cousin, I thought she deserves a Princess name but in the end we decided that she’s not very big ball gowns and rule over the kingdom kinda gal. I think she’s more of a She-Ra sort of wicked awesome but that could also be because she has nifty swords and rides a unicorn.

Lyss has been here almost a month but she blends right into the madness flawlessly. Making me wish that this sister from another mister had arrived sooner and would stay longer. She is a hoot!

too ruffI’m typing away on the laptop that may have been surgically attached to my person by now; Miss Lyss and The Handsome Prince are sitting on the bed talking. He’s razzing her about her New England accent and the next thing I know these two grown ups are barking at each other.

Say Woof.

Now say Roof.

Comes out sounding pretty similar.

They start laughing and proceed to say roof and woof over and over until it just sounded like they were barking at one another.

Molly (our Labrador) has her head cocked to one side looking at his freak show as though they were singing the songs of her people.

hidingFor the first week while Lyss moved herself into the new time zone and caught up after the great trek across country to re-locate, we made it our mission to watch as many old movies as possible.

I have yet to bust into the current century and are still rockin’ the VHS with a rather large collection. From The Happiest Millionaire to The ‘Burbs, Uncle Buck, Bird On A Wire, Hocus Pocus, Oldies like Harvey and a few newer flicks too tossed in for good measure.

She’d crawl into The Handsome Prince’s spot in the bed to watch movies while I pretended to actually get work done besides laugh my butt off with her.

Thus only confirming my suspicions that Lyss was actually meant to be The Prince’s twin sister but she had to take her sweet time and come a few years later and ya know, be raised on the other side of the country.

It’s eerie how much they are alike.

I love it, I love her and I’m going to be sad when our big old slumber party comes to an end.

Go figure… she actually wants to leave all this fun and find that perfect apartment for her?!

Sigh… Lyss-napping is a Federal offense so I guess I’ll have to let her go sometime.

Welcome To California… We couldn’t be any more thrilled that you made it!

lisa

I felt that I have lost my cool. Alright so I really didn’t own any in the first place but it is entirely possible that there is some layer of super cool under that smattering of awkward, the layers of geeky and the inability to hold it together when a famous singer follows little ol’ me on Twitter.

The ensuing phone call went a little something like this…

Handsome Prince: Hi.

Me: YOU will NEVER believe what just happened!!!

H.P: What.

Me: THE Lisa Loeb is following ME on Twitter and I didn’t stalk her first! (Squeal in decibels perhaps only heard by my animals) You know, the singer that sang the soundtrack to our days in the Montero…

Yes folks, I then proceeded to sing an overzealous medley of her music into the phone.

Mind you, I can not sing a lick. It’s painful, my people.

H.P.: That’s very nice honey. I remember. I’m currently shoved under this car, do you think we could do this later?

Alright so we can’t all be rock stars.

However we can act like total goobers when those who really qualify find us on Twitter.

I am way cooler in my own mind since then.

Otherwise, I don’t believe any one else has noticed my shift into awesome… shh, I’m taking cool by sneak attack. ;)

fly choas panic disorder

Buzz around, see what you think, then click on these links for a peek into some other homes:

 

http://BakingInATornado.com

http://followmehome.shellybean.com

http://stacysewsandschools.wordpress.com/

http://thesadderbutwisergirl.com

http://menopausalmother.blogspot.com/

http://mooreorganizedmayhem.blogspot.com/

http://hypnoticbard.blogspot.com/

http://themomisodes.com/

http://spatulasonparade.blogspot.com/

http://dates2diapers2.blogspot.com

http://www.therowdybaker.com

http://www.eviljoyspeaks.wordpress.com

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4 comments

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  1. The Sadder But Wiser Girl

    Lisa Loeb is following you? SWEET! I would have totally gotten out from under the car and squealed right with you! Crappy Pictures started following me this week-I feel like I’ve arrived now. Hooray for being sort of popular! :-D

  2. Michele@followmehome

    Hey, I loved Lisa Loeb! Lucky girl! My favorite story this time was the chapstick in the kitty litter! That was hilarious. I also love that someone wonderful came to her rescue with the “only cool kids pee their pants.” Hahaha. You would fit in perfectly at my house :)

  3. Sarah @ The Momisodes

    I would be equally ecstatic if Hanson or Matthew Gray Gubler were to follow me! I HAVE had a convo with Tommy Dobson from The Fresh Beat Band on Twitter on more than one occasion….that’s pretty cool. lol

    And I ADORE the “Billy Madison” references. I can’t watch “The Dark Knight Rises” because when Bane talks, I see Billy Madison for some reason…..

  4. Karen @BakingInATornado

    The stuff that goes on in your house is always hysterical. You are a very brave woman to add another person to the mix. Although I’m not at all surprised that you’ve opened your heart to a house guest or that you’ll miss her when she goes.

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