Physics, Chemistry . the number of atoms of one isotope of an element divided by the total number of atoms in a mixture of the isotopes.
For a few weeks I pondered, what word starting with an A could sum up my life.
Each time the answer was… abundance.
Saying abundance almost feels dirty, like I’m being prideful and casting shadows.
In NO way has my life been easy or by society standards do I have it all…
never the less it’s ALWAYS been absolutely overflowing, abundance.
I grew up having a closet full of clothes to wear, sports to participate in and food in the fridge.
There was always enough to share, even though my mother worked too hard and made less per month than my first real paycheck.
We didn’t have it all… we had better than that. We found a beautiful life that didn’t lack. We took in all the local theater and movies, even if sometimes we passed programs for free admission.
As the baby of the family by almost 10 years… I had older sisters. My mother remarried and I got another Brother and Sister but again they were already grown.
I was raised most of my life as an only child, which I hated.
Since birth I had a best friend. Someone who loved me totally and completely without question. Called me on my crap, taught me, listened and made me waffles topped with an entire whipped cream can… My sister Tiffany.
Kindred spirits and the fact she could almost drive by the time I was walking made her my mama away from Mom.
She’d pick me up when I was annoyed by Mom and paid me to do her dishes. She pulled me out of the mud when I got stuck trying to catch crab. Spent hours hanging onto my back end while I was wading out learning to fish. She let me sit for hours and talk to her pigs. Never the one to say, “don’t get wet” at the beach… she planned for it and might just make you an amazing fort out of drift wood too. She sheltered me from so much and allowed me to explore, learn and be happy. Last time we visited, she took my kids on a two hour “Fun Tour” complete with spray frosting and a trip to the donut store that also sells sushi and pizza. It’s a small town. I miss you like rain Tiffy. Another year is too long!
She has always been my abundance of fun and when I’m with her, where ever it is… I’m home.
Most think of having 4 children as an abundance.
We did too.
My Handsome Prince missed much of the infant years with our kids. The man has NEVER changed a diaper in his WHOLE life!
(Before hate mail flows… he totally would but wasn’t physically there to do so.)
We changed everything up and made our world revolve around our family.
We wanted another baby and I got cancer when we conceived a molar pregnancy.
I didn’t respond like normal and we went through hell keeping me alive.
I eventually beat cancer and then we went on to get pregnant again and lost our son at 18 weeks.
We’ve done the testing. We’ve searched through every last part of our hearts. We’ve endured the home studies and paper trail that comes with the adoption process. We decided that… we’re not ready, yet. This is a LIFE not a whim or replacement. We need some time still to heal. I thought that was such a bad thing to admit out loud but actually it was the smartest decision for now.
Adoption, in it’s many forms takes SO much more than most understand. I am realizing that what I thought about adoption was just the tippy top of the iceberg. For now, we still have a house full and I am grateful for each and every one of those sweet spirits. We are the place that the kids all gather.
Never alone, always with an abundance of children.
I am blessed with an abundance of LOVE!
I married my high school Best Friend… just after a failed marriage with 2 kids, after we had 2 of our own kids and declared to the world that we were going to be Kurt Russel and Goldie Hawn- Happily in love forever without a piece of paper. W-E-L-L… once everyone didn’t care, we just signed on the dotted line. Funny but we love being married. We work together, play together and do everything for the kids together. Really, truth is: We’re that sick couple that really likes each other. Marriage isn’t easy. Bottom line is we keep love and respect in the same sentence. I’ve always called him My Handsome Prince because he is. He is my fairy tale and then he sits down to do homework with the kids and I fall head over heels again and again. He encourages my quirks and looks past my flaws. My Handsome Prince has the amazing ability to accept people for who they are but cherish their potential. My kids vs. our kids doesn’t exist. It’s our family and everyone counts equal. We don’t have the biggest house, the best cars or take the grandest vacations. I wake up to my best friend every day. He believes in me and has my back 100%. We struggle, we work and sometimes cry but at the end of it all…
we have an abundance of love to go ’round.
I have been held together many a time by friendships.
Strong women in my life that shared an abundance of love, tips and recipes.
I found myself at a low point in my life. I was really struggling to breathe. I felt like the biggest bottom feeder yet I was working myself to the bone to be something everyone else thought I should be. Exhausted. Feeling like poo. I had hands reaching down to help lift me.
They showed me that I was worth it. They honestly believed in me.
They made me believe too.
EVERYTHING changed in my life because a hand full loved and supported me unconditionally.
I will be forever changed from the love and examples so freely given to me.
I may not have a ton of people by my side but those that are there…
Bring an abundance of support and love!
When I hear the word abundance, I think of money.
Who doesn’t want an abundance of money?
Of course shopping is great and I lust after things on the Nordstrom website all the time!
Would I make the purchase if I had the cash?
We are saving for many things. A car for a soon to be driver, a dream vacation, a realistic vacation, our little dream piece of property, to fix the plumbing in between our bathrooms… the list goes on.
Call me crazy BUT I’ve had a first hand view of the problems money can bring, I’d rather earn and save thanks!
I’d rather coupon, DIY and work my butt off to make it.
No shame in a life lived for your family that requires hard work to do it.
We both could make so much more if we’d suck it up and leave our kids.
We fought hard to get to a place where we could work harder than ever to make our family businesses work for our family.
Yes, we make sacrifices BUT doesn’t every parent?
Not willing to chase 6 figures if it means losing the every day life with these people we created.
So we get creative, work weekends, holidays, nights and everything in between to keep our heads above water.
The kids work with us but never have a clue how tight it might come.
This is OUR dream and we’re living it.
There is time to make all the riches in the world when the chicks fly away. For today and until they find their wings we work harder so they never feel it and gather what it takes to be successful on their own.
They ALWAYS have a parent 24/7.
That was OUR goal and we accept the work it takes to keep it that way.
We have and abundance of Chutzpah and Faith in ourselves.
Our Forever was almost interrupted.
Cancer did it’s best to claim me.
We kept fighting back and beat it for now.
It was awful but the worst part was watching my family go through it.
We grew so much closer. This family is full of troopers and we marched through everything as a team.
These are the people who look to me for answers and I was slowly drowning.
In the darkest of days, people allowed the walls to drop. Those that stood up to be counted amongst the angels were few but only the best rises to the top.
I had people I didn’t know playing the lotto for us to help combat mounting bills.
How could I sink like Artax in the Neverending Story, into the Swamp of despair? So many prayers were going up in my name and dollars plunked down in the hopes that $ could ease worries. My children, My Prince, Our fairytale…
I got lucky and am almost to the 2 year cancer free mark!
An Abundance of support, love and charity carried us through the worst of days and right into the sunshine.
OK, so I wont be featured on Forbes, the cover of Shape, Glamour or O.
That’s not who I am.
I live an extraordinary life with an amazing cast of characters.
I wouldn’t have it any other way.
They are the reason why I work so hard, love so much and get up everyday smiling.
I have such an abundance that makes for a wonderful life.
I am rich beyond measure.